"Wake The Dead"
Airdate: January 28, 2000

The crew of the Lexx stumble upon a transport where the teenaged passengers have been in cryogenic sleep for hundreds of years. Out of a sense of... uh... need to further the plot, Stan and Xev reanimate them and bring them aboard the Lexx. These juvenile delinquents decide to keep living La Vida Loca and wake Kai up in such a way as to make him revert to his homicidal tendencies.

*ahem* I hereby take back any benefit of the doubt I might have once extended the cast or crew of Lexx. I can only theorize that I must have been drugged.

I also firmly hold the opinion that the people behind Lexx are suffering from the same condition. Only I'm certain that they are self medicating. Oh, and whomever at The Sci Fi Channel decided to spend the money to buy this show? Exact same problem.

I've decided that a more appropriate title for this episode would be, I Know What You Smoked While You Wrote This.

I get that this is a parody of a teen slasher flick. I get that the performances are supposed to be over the top. What I don't get is how it's supposed to be funny. Or entertaining. Or anything besides annoying.

I have nothing positive to say about this episode, or this show for that matter. The teens weren't even decent stock characters. You had the young lovers embroiled in a spat, the whining fat kid, the nymphomaniacal nymphet, and of course the trouble maker. They died messily and stupidly. The only problem was that they didn't die quick enough.

Bungholes.

I kept hoping that, as per his instructions, Kai would kill everyone, but knowing that this was only episode 10 out of 20 for the second season, I realized that my dreams were bound to be crushed. And they were. By some stupid plot device that left Stan and Xev alive.

Damnit.

I mean the least Killer Kai could have done was ripped the innards out of the annoying robot head. But noooo...

Bastard.

With Rated Lexx and four episodes under my belt I can truthfully say that I really tried to give this show a chance. Again, I'm not against humor in sci fi or even female characters who are comfortable with their sexuality. However, I am against feeble attempts at humor in sci fi that don't work and scantily clad female characters that need to be rescued every week. The first is boring and the second is irritating.

Once when I was in the fifth grade some girl spoiling for a fight got in my face and said, "I heard you been talkin' about me." My reply was a cool, "I got better things to do with my time." From now on Lexx gets the same answer.

Besides, Now and Again and Farscape -- two excellent shows -- also air on Fridays. They're more than adequate when it comes to satisfying my genre itch.

-- Linda M. Najera

Lexx airs at 10pm EST, Fridays on The Sci Fi Channel.

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