The Ninth Gate
Old-school horror geekdom enhanced by shirtless Johnny Depp.

"Man, I really am unbelievably sexy when I'm pensive... Oh, did I say that aloud?"

The director of such seminal, genre-redefining classics as Repulsion and Rosemary's Baby, Roman Polanski is undoubtedly one of the greatest filmmakers of the 1960s and 1970s. His dark, perverse, yet oddly subtle approach can be seen in countless horror films today, whether in style (the urbane, sickly comedic American Psycho), in tone (the restrained, effective Sixth Sense) or in unabashed rip-offs (the shameless and utterly crappy Astronaut's Wife). The Ninth Gate -- a personal return to horror released during a mass revival of the genre -- is a film very much in this tradition, and it goes on to reinforce what we all already know: that Roman Polanski is still one of the greatest filmmakers... of the 1960s and 1970s.

The Ninth Gate, starring an often shirtless and always yummy Johnny Depp, could have been released twenty-five years ago and no one would have batted an eye. This is a horror film that is as old-school as they come -- it's set largely in historic European capitals, features special FX at about the level of a direct-to-video movie, and revolves around a man who sells and collects books. Books, people. When is the last time a movie focused on those? Even more than that, we're supposed to think he's a rebel because he manages to repeatedly swindle all those other bad-ass types who also collect books. What a wild child! Of course, since this swaggering specimen of the literati is Johnny Depp, we do believe this, and because The Ninth Gate doesn't just revolve around books, but books about Satan, he does seem a bit more of a renegade than most.

"Like, libraries are cool and stuff."

Johnny plays Dean Corso, a rare book dealer who speaks Latin by day and has wild animal sex by night (and by day, sometimes, too). He is hired by Boris Balkan, a collector played by Frank Langella in his most intimidating role since Skeletor, to find matching copies of a text said to have the ability to summon the demonic. Johnny travels to Portugal and France in search of the two accompanying works, and in doing so encounters strange characters -- most notably a mysterious girl with seemingly supernatural powers, played by Emmanuelle Seigner -- and a dark conspiracy that threatens his life. This is a very old-fashioned plot that thrives more on intellect than emotion (Johnny spends countless time analyzing minute details on each page), and the result is fun and suspenseful, but surprisingly, not particularly cerebral.

The Ninth Gate is a book collecting story along the lines of the computer game Myst -- an adventure that has everything to do with the search and hardly anything to do with what's really in the texts themselves. The devil plays a secondary role -- the actual Satanic mass shown is along the lines of End of Days (minus the Guns 'n' Roses song), and the thoughtful, philosophical overtones of Polanski's other Satanic movie, Rosemary's Baby, are not in evidence. The intended audience for this film is likely similar to that of Myst -- smart geeker types looking for adventure, challenge, but nothing too intellectual; the movie is a puzzle with an extremely hot guy as the key. Is it a masterpiece? Not even close. But it's fun, quirky, beautifully directed and very well-acted, particularly by Depp.

"P-A-R-T...Y? Because ya gotta!"

Also deserving of note is the sheer visual appeal of the film. Polanski's style may not have changed over the last few decades, but he is still, as before, an incredible, outstanding director. The Ninth Gate is worth seeing for its opening credit sequence alone, which plays like some Disneyland simulation ride created by a medieval monk. The cinematography is gorgeous, and the haunting, melodic score by Wojciech Kilar is one of the movie's greatest assets. There may not be much beneath the surface of the story beyond pursuit and chase, but at least that surface looks good. The Ninth Gate is laudable for being so unrelentingly old-fashioned in the face of big-budget, trendy movies; it is thoroughly uncool in the best possible way.

DROOL FACTOR: Johnny, Johnny, Johnny! This is the full Depp experience, more so even than Sleepy Hollow -- here you get to see Johnny speak lots of languages, read all these creepy books, and then take off his shirt and make love like a wild man. The glasses definitely work, and his goatee is far less skanky on Dean Corso than on off-screen, unkempt Johnny. Well done, my friend, well done.

GROSS-OUT FACTOR: The close-up on the strangely scarred ass of Lena Olin, I suppose. Nothing too disgusting other than a few hangings here and there; the film is more thriller than straight-out horror.

STRONG CHICK FACTOR: Sure, she's Polanski's wife, but Emmanuelle Seigner as "The Girl" is fairly cool nonetheless. The fashion sense leaves a bit to be desired, but she drives a great car and manages to kick some demonic ass in her own way. (And wow, Polanski saved the standard nude scene for the final act! Ooh, such restraint.)

-- Sarah Kendzior

The Ninth Gate is currently in theaters nationwide.

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