Farscape Up Close
It ain't Muppets in Space.
      by Linda M. Najera and pisher

THE ADVENTURES

Prepare for starburst!

"Premiere"

Summary: Astronaut John Crichton, Jr., sans little dog Toto, is sucked up by a cyclone, and taken to the marvelous land of -- well. It was probably an influence.

But before his adventure begins, his life on Earth is given a peek. Despite being something of a genius (Managing Editor's Note: ...and even more of a buff hottie...), John doubts that he can ever measure up to his famous astronaut father. His lack of self-esteem leads Crichton Senior's to impart these prophetic words of wisdom: "Maybe every man gets to be his own kind of hero."

Having come up with a theory that uses Earth's gravitation field to accelerate spacecraft, John is eager to test it out. However, when he sets out on a trial run in his shuttle, the Farscape, he accidentally creates a wormhole, and ends up in the middle of a firefight in a distant part of the universe. Which is, of course, crammed with strange sentient beings, including the Peacekeepers, a mean and xenophobic equivalent of Starfleet, who are recruited from a race called Sebaceans -- who appear just like humans, only with Australian accents. Yes, Crichton just happens to look exactly like the most hated species in this neck of the woods. He also manages to accidentally cause the death of the brother of Peacekeeper Captain Bialar Crais, who swears bloody vengeance upon him, but before that can happen, gets plucked out of space by fugitives aboard a sentient bio-craft named Moya, a prisoner herself, whom they free from her "control-collar" to make good their escape. Crichton is shot full of "translator microbes", which allow him (and us, albeit a bit selectively at times) to understand what everyone else is saying. At which point, the narrative ceases to be entirely about Crichton and shifts the series' focus to include the entire group of fugitives.

The blue one, Zhaan, is a Delvian priest, and Delvians are considered weird and anarchistic by the other races, and she is considered weird and anarchistic by other Delvians. Rygel, the Hynerian (who is played by a muppet) was the undisputed monarch of billions of people, which tends to support the belief that hereditary monarchy is a rather improbable system of government for an advanced galactic empire. Nonetheless, he is a cunning little bastard, and was able to obtain the codes to release them from their cells, which is primarily why the others put up with him. Crichton learns firsthand that D'argo, the big surly Luxan, has a poisonous 20 foot tongue he can stun people with and is informed that the only reason he was brought aboard was because they didn't recognize his ship's technology and thought it might be able to help them escape.

The rag tag crew is rounded out by Peacekeeper Officer Aeryn Sun (for which the males in the audience will be eternally grateful to whomever was in charge of casting), who introduces herself to Crichton by knocking him down -- but later, when her fellow Peacekeepers are carting him away, speaks up in his defense -- only to be condemned as "irreversibly contaminated" by contact with inferior races. Sentenced to death by that proclamation she becomes a fugitive herself when she, D'argo and Crichton manage to escape (again) from the Peacekeepers, and Crichton's gravitational acceleration formula allows Moya to rocket away into the uncharted territories.

Now all that remains is to avoid the relentless Captain Crais, find Crichton some Ruby Slippers -- um I mean a wormhole back to earth, a new home for the disinherited Aeryn, and starcharts that will take Zhaan, D'argo and Rygel back to their respective planets. Oh, and to learn to trust each other and work together, in spite of the fact that there is no established leader, and they are onboard a living ship that has a mind (and agenda) of its own. Piece o' cake, right?

Relevant Trivia: Oh Goddess, where to begin? Hynerians fart helium when they're upset. D'argo is a fairly young Luxan warrior, having been on only two battle campaigns. Zhaan is around 800 years old. Crichton has a habit of uttering Earth pop-cultural references that no one else gets. Moya has a being named Pilot grafted to her for life, who acts as an interface between her and the crews. Like all Leviathans, she has no weaponry and no means of defense other than "starburst", a brief random hyperspace jump, which always requires a bit of recovery time afterwards. Aeryn seems to learn and adapt quickly, and has improbably long, beautiful hair for a battle hardened soldier. Rygel hates starbursts, and likes to eat a lot.

Don't worry. You'll catch up eventually.

"I, E.T".

Summary: A beacon, beaming Moya's coordinates out to every Peacekeeper ship or station that might be in the area, is discovered and in order to successfully remove it, Clorium, a sedative agent for the Leviathan, must be found. While Zhaan and Rygel prepare Moya for the sensitive and painful operation, D'Argo, John, and Aeryn are sent in search of the sedative.

The trio land on a planet which has yet to make first contact and end up having to evade the local authorities. Luckily for our intrepid heroes, they stumble across one of the more open-minded inhabitants and she helps them dodge the prospect of being locked away in the Denean equivalent of Area 51.

Relevant Trivia: Zhaan and Rygel have known each other for many, many years.

"Exodus From Genesis"

Summary: While evading one of Crais' scout ships, Moya is invaded by a swarm of lifeforms which quickly take up residence and begin duplicating members of the crew. These replicants begin to take over Moya and alter her systems for their own mysterious purpose. It isn't until they bond with Zhaan that these Draks are able to explain that their actions are intended to aid their reproductive process. The only problem is that they have raised Moya's internal temperature, thereby putting Aeryn at risk due to the fact that Sebaceans do not handle heat well.

Events come to a head when Moya is boarded by the Peacekeepers from the scout ship and they begin killing off the replicants, mistaking them for escaped prisoners. While John works to get rid of the Peacekeepers, it is Rygel, speaking monarch-to-monarch with the Drak sovereign, who convinces her not to raise the temperature to levels that would kill every non-Drak aboard. The Peacekeepers are defeated, the Drak's breeding cycle is completed, and everything goes back to normal.

Well, relatively speaking, of course.

Relevant Trivia: Sebaceans (Aeryn and the other Peacekeepers) are not as much like humans (John) as it might seem. Rygel is good for something after all.

"Throne For A Loss"

Summary: Rygel's baser tendencies (greed, self-centeredness, thievery) get him in a load of trouble when the Tavlek traders turn out to be kidnappers instead. If the Dominar hadn't been carrying an important part of Moya's propulsion system (which he stole because it looks like a precious gem), it's doubtful his crewmates would have affected a rescue.

And what a rescue. Attempting to use a captured Tavlek weapon, John, Aeryn, and D'Argo end up trying to combat the dangerous side effects of the drug it introduces into their systems. The hyped-up aggression they all experience almost leads to the failure of the search and rescue, but eventually both Rygel and the crystal he stole are returned and Moya.

"Back And Back And Back To The Future"

Summary: Strange things start happening after two survivors of a shipwreck are brought aboard. Crichton begins experiencing unusual visions which turn out to be glimpses of possible futures, many of which involve the death of his friends.

In his attempts to change the future by using the knowledge gained by these visions, Crichton only seems to be making matters worse. It is only when one of the survivors is revealed as a techno-spy that John is able to thwart her plans and save the day.

Relevant Trivia: The Luxans and Ilanics are long-time allies and genetic cousins.

"Thank God It's Friday, Again"

Summary: In a rage, D'Argo goes off half-cocked and ends up on a planet that seems to be one big, stereotypical, hippie commune. After allowing for some cooling-off time, the others go in search of him. What they find however is that D'Argo has embraced the overly-blissful lifestyle of the Skykarians. D'Argo without an attitude, without the burning desire to return home? Yeah, something's wrong. To make matters worse, Rygel feasted on the planet's main crop, the Tannot root, and ended up smelly, slimy, and poisonous.

While Pilot and Aeryn are forced to try and find a cure for the Hynerian, Zhaan falls under the planet's spell. Luckily John manages to dig up the solution to the big mystery. It seems that the Tannot root not only puts almost everyone who ingests it a malleable slave, but also makes one hell of an oil for weaponry, a fact well known by the Peacekeepers who created this planet-wide plantation. In the end, the eyes of the inhabitants are opened to their status as slaves for the Peacekeepers and in retaliation, they vow to stand up to and fight their masters.

Relevant Trivia: Aeryn's continuing education as to the villainy of the Peacekeepers. Not just in her own situation, but for scores of others as well.

"PK Tech Girl"

Summary: A floating wreck is discovered to be the Zelbinion, the ship on which Rygel was first imprisoned and suffered untold torture on by the particularly cruel Captain Durka. Once aboard, the crew encounter Peacekeeper technician Gilina, the only surviving member of her salvage team who were attacked by a Sheyang scavenger ship.

When the Sheyang return, D'Argo must devise and execute a ruse to keep them away until Gilina and John's technical expertise activate the Zelbinion's defense screen.

Relevant Trivia: Gilina, although attracted to John, isn't ready to abandon her Peacekeeper status yet and so returns to her people. Her affection, however, remains, as is seen in "Nerve" when she attempts to help Crichton and Chiana escape.

"That Old Black Magic"

Summary: In search of a remedy for Rygel's nasty flu, the crew splits up to cover more ground in an exotic marketplace. When John is approached by a strange man who seems to know quite a bit about him, and even hints that he might be able to help, Crichton follows him. Sort of.

John's body is later found unconscious and with the help of Liko, a local shaman, the others discover what has actually occurred. John's spirit has been stolen by Maldis, an energy vampire of sorts who has enough magical prowess to bring Crais' spirit to him as well. Maldis feeds off the negative energy put out by Crais and Crichton as they spar, but with Liko's help, Zhaan is able to use the powers of the darker portions of her nature to make Maldis vulnerable to attack.

Relevant Trivia: That fact that Zhaan has a darker side at all is a bit of a surprise. And that she is so powerful is even more so.

"DNA Mad Scientist"

Summary: NamTar, a mysterious scientist, promises the crew a crystal that contains the star maps that will lead them out of the Uncharted Territories and back home. All he requires from them is a bit of their genetic material. That is not the price for this favor, however. In exchange he asks for one of Pilot's arms. Rygel, Zhaan, and D'Argo agree.

In a deeply disturbing scene, the three forcibly remove the limb from Pilot and return to the planet's surface to make the exchange. Reconsidering her initial decision not to take part in the exchange, Aeryn approaches NamTar and asks for the coordinates of a Sebacean colony which is not under Peacekeeper influence. Instead he uses her as a guinea pig and injects Pilot's DNA into her system, thereby forcing a horrific change. John manages to convince NamTar's assistant, Kornata to help and together they find a cure for Aeryn and return NamTar to his original state.

Relevant Trivia: Due to the experiment, Aeryn's body still seems to harbor some lasting effects from her contact with Pilot's DNA. She is more technically inclined (re :Moya's systems) and can almost replace an ailing Pilot when it becomes necessary.

"They've Got A Secret"

Summary: During a sweep to discover any more Peacekeeper devices, D'Argo is accidentally shot out into space as a result of moving one. He is retrieved, but is suffering from hallucinations just as Moya begins experiencing a variety of system malfunctions. The crew must snap D'Argo out of his increasingly violent delusions and figure out what in the hell has happened to Moya at the same time. The first problem is solved by the passage of time, but not before it is revealed that D'Argo had married and had a child with a Sebacean woman. Her brother, a Peacekeeper, insisting that she had brought shame upon the family, murdered her and framed D'Argo for the deed.

And just what is it that is causing Moya to experience all these problems? Look below.

Relevant Trivia: Moya is pregnant!

"Til The Blood Runs Clear"

Summary: During a wormhole experiment, Crichton's ship undergoes damage so he and Aeryn seek out a mechanic on the nearby planet. While dirtside, they notice a beacon broadcasting news of a reward for the recapture of Rygel, Zhaan, and D'Argo. A couple of Volkarian bounty hunters claim to be hot on the trail of the escapees so John tries to throw them off the scent by pretending to be an even more bad-ass bounty hunter. Things get a little strange however, when his bravado earns him the respect and cooperation of the other bounty hunters.

Unfortunately, an impatient D'Argo goes to down to the planet to hurry them along and gets captured by the Volkarians. In a bit of play acting that he probably enjoyed, John demands half the bounty on his Luxan crewmate while roughing him up a bit in keeping with his cover. Meanwhile, despite an offer of amnesty from Crais, Aeryn decides to modify the beacon and continue on the journey with the others.

Relevant Trivia: For Zhaan, solar radiation is simply orgasmic, a point brought up again in "Bone To Be Wild."

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