I Wish That I Had Duck Feet
A book by Dr. Seuss (writing as Theo. LeSieg)

Ever wanted to be different? Ever yearned for some skill, some talent or ability, so unique as to set you apart from the crowd? You know that you have. The ideal fruit of social acceptance is too tasty not to pass through a human mind. Dr. Seuss takes this concept head-on in his short yet hugely encompassing book: I Wish That I Had Duck Feet. Not only does Seuss masterfully pinpoint our imaginative passions (who can say they could not find a use for duck feet?), but his development of plot is in such a form that we learn something about our own selves. The illustration, sculpted by B. Tobey, adds to the playful atmosphere that the story promotes, and is the perfect companion to Seuss's rolling, lyrical writing style.

The story's lead is a young boy, unnamed, anonymous; he could be any one of us. The character remains ambiguous to the reader for the entirety of the book, yet because of our ability to empathise so clearly with the boy's personal ambition, we never feel detached from his character. How, you may ask, is a small boy wishing for duck feet in anyway parallel to my own thirst for acceptance? And well you might. In order to better exemplify, we shall now examine the story itself.

Our child hero's first wish is for duck feet. Yes. Webbed, yellow, three clawed duck feet. And why not? In the words of our lead man himself: "You can splash around in duck feet. You don't have to keep them dry." How many of us have been walking home on cold winter nights only to mistakenly step into what seems like the deepest possible puddle around? Be sure that on that night, somewhere in your subconscious, there was a small thought blinking amidst the stronger mundane thinking of your mind: If I had duck feet, this would've never happened.

It is only Seuss, in his genius, who allows us to see our own quiet longings.

But what of those who have already discovered this aspect of themselves? Those seeking answers, not further questions to their own souls? Yes, this book offers something for you also. Maybe not the answers you seek, but rather a message from someone who has fought this battle before, and as we learn toward the closing of the book, someone who has won.

Our hero is not perfect. His dreams of standing out of the crowd are blatantly selfish and his feelings of inadequacy toward Big Bill Brown are, as far as we can tell from these pages, completely unfounded. We have no reason to think Big Bill has done anything more than unintentionally intimidate our hero in the school playground. Yet with every wistful fantasy our hero concocts, increasing Big Bill Brown's social ineptitude seems to play a key role. Whether it be that having deer horns allows our hero to wear ten hats to Bill Brown's meagre one, or the desire to have an elephant nose with which to sneeze and blow him down, this story's main character shows the true human nature of competition and lust for victory over a perceived enemy.

It is because we all carry these same traits that Seuss is able to develop a character that, although may at times not meet our stereotypical "hero" ideal, ultimately succeeds in a search for himself, a battle for confidence and self-acceptance won.

But what of romance? Of course, as with any worthy book, I Wish That I Had Duck Feet is not without its unrequited love. Once again our hero's dreams of being different are driven by another human need: Love. Whilst not inferring any sexual ideas into his text, Seuss has captured a young boy's youthful quest for feminine acquiescence dutifully in the relationship between our hero and his teacher, Miss Banks.

"I wish I had a long, long tail.
And I can tell you why.
I could hit a fly ten feet away
And hit him in the eye.

I know Miss Banks would like this
She would smile and she would say,
'No other boy in town can hit
a fly so far away.'"

The burning flame of innocent passion that our hero fans with his animal-appendage fantasies is strong enough to reignite a spark of hope for truth in love within every one of us.

And then there's closure. The most fulfilling thing about this book is the warm understanding reached by those who have read each page with respect and patience for the master Seuss. As you read through the book, you travel the ups and downs with our child hero, a boy who yearns to become a better person. You travel the journey yourself. The essence of the entire story, from front cover to back, is contained within the last page. It is a lesson in self-acceptance, a relief in one's personal individuality and a comfort that you alone can bestow upon yourself.

Before I finish and leave you with the words of this story's hero, words crafted by the mighty pen of Dr. Seuss himself, I want to prompt you to find the children's section of your local bookstore or library, find this book, and read it. Maybe you will find just one more piece to your own personal puzzle:

"AND SO...
I think
There are some things
I do not wish to be.

And that is why
I think that I
Just wish to be like ME."

Re-read Factor: All of us slip from our paths in this life, lose sight of how we want to live or who we want to be, we all need to find our focus from time to time. Read this book through once. Then you will know if it is something you may need to read again.

Sequel Factor: The story written in this work is complete. Seuss has presented a lesson strongly encapsulated in one healthy nugget of simplicity. No sequel is needed or warranted here.

Strong Chick Factor: The lead character of this Seussian adventure is a small boy, but the message etched so sweetly to the subtext is universal and needs no translation between the sexes. We all feel as this boy does at times. I could, however, comment on the child hero's mother and her firm stance on keeping duck feet & whale spouts out of the house; I could make mention of Miss Banks, a teacher who obviously earns the admiration of her students as the best teachers do. I could speak of these things. But I won't.

-- Rohin McDermott

I Wish That I Had Duck Feet, published by Random Library, is currently available in hardcover and paperback.

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