Getting Buffed
The final part of our Buffy guide: a look at seasons three and four.
      by Lisa Kincaid

First, we introduced you to the lovely and lickable players in the first part of our guide to Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Then we told you all about the happenings you might've missed in part two, which was an episode guide to the first two seasons. Now we bring you a look at more recent episodes with the final installment of our guide: a look at seasons three and four.

THE THIRD SEASON

Buffy Summers: The one girl in all the world who can really kick vampire ass.

"Anne"
Summary: At the end of the second season's "Becoming, Part 2", Buffy was on a bus to parts unknown, unable to deal with her duty, her crumbling life, and the fact that she sent her lover to Hell. In the third season premiere she reaches her destination of Los Angeles, where she takes a job as a waitress and tries to hide out from her life, until she's recognized by one of the diner's patrons -- Lily, one of the goth kids who hung with Ford in "Lie To Me". Lily's changed her life now, too, and she's got a loving boyfriend; but when he mysteriously vanishes, Buffy's drawn back to her demon-fighting ways. She and Lily end up trapped in a demon dimension, where teens off the street are forced into slavery, but time moves differently in other dimensions, and the kids end up aged and dumped back on the street days later when they're too old to work. Buffy kicks some major demon ass, saves everyone and realizes she can't run from her calling: she gives Lily her apartment and job for a new start, and Buffy heads back to Sunnydale.
And the moral is: Don't run away from home. You'll only end up in a demon slave labor camp surrounded by bad actors.

"Dead Man's Party"
Summary: It is true what they say: you can never go home again. Or at least, you might wish that you hadn't. Buffy's returned to Sunnydale after running away from home, but her friends aren't sure how to handle her anymore, and Buffy's thinking she should never have come back. The gang throws her a very large, very loud party to welcome her home, but Buffy's not into it; when she overhears her mother saying that things were easier when Buffy was gone, she decides to run away again. Willow interrupts her escape and a very public fight breaks out between Buffy and her mom at the party. They have to postpone the scene of heartfelt anguish until later, though, when an ancient mask that Joyce is using as decoration calls forth an army of zombies, who crash the party looking for the mask. Buffy kicks living dead ass, and the carnage brings the gang closer together, on the path to normalcy again.
And the moral is: Be careful when buying antiques. They may be evil.

Faith the Vampire Slayer: The other girl in all the world who can kick vampire ass.

"Faith, Hope & Trick"
Summary: Buffy's having a hard time moving on after Angel, but when Scott Hope, a cute guy at her high school, shows an interest in her, she thinks it might be her chance at a normal life. But she does have more pressing matters to attend to: when Kendra died in "Becoming, Part 1", another Slayer was called in her place, and that girl, a real bad-ass named Faith, arrives in Sunnydale. On her trail are Mr. Trick, a business-savvy vampire for the nineties, and Kakistos, a vamp so old that he's beginning to look like a very large goat. Faith's got everyone in the Scooby Gang awed with all her stories of Slaying, and she seems to enjoy the work, stirring up resentment in Buffy. Scott Hope invites Buffy to a film festival and she happily accepts, but then he gives her a present... a ring he thinks is for friendship that's actually a Claddagh like the one Angel gave Buffy. Faith turns out to be a little unbalanced with the pent-up rage going on, and she and Buffy nearly fight before being interrupted by vampires. Together, Faith and Buffy face up to the bad guy and dust him, but Mr. Trick slips away. Scott, meanwhile, hasn't given up on Buffy, and she agrees to date him. She goes to the mansion and leaves Angel's Claddagh on the floor there, then leaves. She just misses the light-and-hot-guy show as Angel literally drops from the sky, returned from Hell.
And the moral is: Don't always be in a hurry... stick around long enough to watch the naked hotties drop from the sky. You'll be glad you did.

Angel returns to Sunnydale, but the boy ain't right.

"Beauty and the Beasts"
Summary: It's that time of the month for Oz, and he's keeping his werewolf-y self locked away in the library book cage. But when there's an animalistic killing in the woods, it seems that Oz may have escaped his prison and eaten someone. Oz is overcome with guilt, and the gang tries to find evidence on whether or not Oz is the culprit. Buffy goes to the woods on patrol, hoping to find another critter that could be the culprit, but what she finds is Angel, returned from Hell and definitely worse for the experience. He's regressed to a savage, animal state, and Buffy's afraid he may have been the one who killed the teen in the woods. She fights with this new growly Angel and knocks him out, takes him back to the mansion and chains him up, and she keeps his return a secret from her friends. The next killing, this time the school counselor, is during the day, letting both Oz and Angel off the hook. When Scott's friend Debbie is noticed to be sporting a shiny new black eye, Oz suspects that the killer might be her abusive boyfriend, Pete. Pete's been taking some sort of chem lab concoction that makes him into a monster of the Mr. Hyde type, and when he imagines that Oz is hitting on his girl, he takes things into his own hands. What he doesn't count on is Oz's change to a werewolf; Oz is loosed in the school, trying to eat Pete, and while the others track Oz with tranquilizers, Buffy pursues the bad guy. Pete kills his girlfriend and nearly does Buffy in, too, but Angel, still semi-chained but escaped from the mansion, rushes in and chokes the student to death, saving Buffy and seeming to have returned somewhat to himself.
And the moral is: When your chemistry experiment is glowing and green, for God's sake, don't drink it!

"Homecoming"
Summary: Trying to prove that she can be popular again like she was at her school in L.A., Buffy runs against Cordelia for Homecoming Queen. Both Buffy and Cordy try to make their mutual friends choose sides, causing rifts in friendships, and resulting in a nasty fight for the title. Meanwhile, Mr. Trick is hosting "Slayerfest '98", an event in which nasties of all kinds pay good money to participate in a Slayer hunt. Xander and Willow grow closer, sharing a kiss as they prepare for the Homecoming dance together. The gang decides to force Buffy and Cordelia to reconcile by making them ride in the rented limo alone, but their driver takes them to the woods, where they're introduced to their activity for the night: Cordelia's been mistaken for Faith, and both "Slayers" are forced to run for their lives as the hunt commences. After fending off evil together, Buffy and Cordelia get back to the school and decide that it doesn't matter which of them wins the Homecoming crown, and they both end up losing to the other two girls running anyway.
And the moral is: High school popularity contests suck. As if we didn't know that already.

Magicked band candy makes Giles behave like a teenager... but with that nice tight t-shirt, we certainly don't mind.

"Band Candy"
Summary: The Sunnydale High School band is selling candy bars to raise money for new uniforms and instruments, but sadly, even chocolate can be perverted for evil causes on the Hellmouth. The candy's been bespelled, and all of the adults who eat it start acting like teenagers. This development greatly disturbs Buffy and gang, who aren't affected by the magic food, and they get on the case to find out woh's behind it. Giles, meanwhile, is becoming the reckless teen he was before, and hooks up with Buffy's mom, Joyce. Buffy and the crew find out that the candy's been bespelled so that none of the adults will be responsible enough to care when a group of vampires steal newborn babies from the hospital to be offered as tribute to a snakey demon. Giles and Joyce, though still under the candy's spell, don't like this baby-eating idea and help the kids track down the culprits: Giles' old school friend Ethan is one of them, and he and Buffy threaten Ethan until he tells them where the babies are. They go into the sewers and rescue the children, and Buffy kills the big snake with a whole lot of fire, while Mr. Trick escapes to fight another day.
And the moral is: I'm tempted to say that chocolate can be bad for you, but that's just not so. So the moral is not to waste chocolate by magicking it. It's already magically delicious, anyway.

"Revelations"
Summary: Faith gets a new Watcher, Gwendolyn Post, who disapproves of the way Giles is handling things. She warns that there's a new demon called Lagos in town, and it's looking for the Glove of Mynhegon, a mystical gauntlet that gives its wearer amazing magical power but once donned, it cannot be removed. Post earns Faith's trust as she trains the emotionally scarred young Slayer, but the rest of the gang intensely dislike her. Buffy is still hiding Angel as he recovers from his stay in Hell and is slowly coming back to himself. Xander and Willow are still making with the illicit smoochies they began in "Homecoming", and are hiding their budding romance from Cordelia and Oz. Trying to alleviate his guilt over cheating on Cordy by doing something useful, Xander goes to look for the Glove, but instead finds Angel -- who had the glove in his possession -- and Buffy, and sees them kiss. He returns to report this development to the rest of the gang, who are crushed by Buffy's duplicity -- Giles especially feels loses his trust in her. Post convinces Faith that Buffy and Angel are working together on the evil team, and Faith goes to kill Angel, ending up fighting Buffy. Meanwhile, Post has gotten her hands on the Glove and tries to kill them all, but Buffy cuts off her gloved hand. Post is killed by the magical discharge from the Glove, and Giles reports that she was fired from the Watcher's Council for pursuing the black arts. Buffy and Giles come to something of an understanding about Angel and begin to rebuild their trust, but Faith's finding herself unable to trust anyone anymore, and closes herself off from Buffy.
And the moral is: All secrets eventually come to light, whether you want them to or not. Oh, and don't trust snooty British Watcher chicks.

James Marsters as Spike: The living embodiment of sex appeal.

"Lovers Walk"
Summary: The Scoobies have just gotten their SAT results, and everybody's thinking of college and the future. But they might not have futures at all -- Spike's back in town, and he's very smashed. Drusilla's dumped him for another demon, and he's determined to get her back. First he ponders setting some sort of nasty curse on Angel, but when he overhears Willow talking to the magic shop owner, he decides on a better plan. He kidnaps Willow and tells her he wants her to do a love spell to bring Drusilla back to him, and if she doesn't, he'll kill Xander, who's also his prisoner. Spike goes off to fetch Willow's spellbook -- which she's left at Buffy's house -- and the ingredients for the love spell, and leave Willow and Xander locked in the burned-out factory together. Spike commiserates with Joyce over a cup of hot chocolate, but is interrupted by Buffy and Angel, who storm in and demand to know where Willow and Xander are. Spike insists that Willow has to perform his spell, and then he'll let them go, and Buffy and Angel are forced to tag along with the vampire to ensure that he releases their friends. But the Mayor -- who seems to be quite evil -- isn't happy about Spike being back in town, and sends a gang of vamps to eliminate him. He fights them off, along with Buffy and Angel, and comes to a decision: he tells Buffy where her friends are and resolves to get Dru back on his own terms by tying her up and torturing her until she loves him again. Unfortunately for Willow and Xander, the damage has been done: the desperation of their situation drives them into a passionate embrace, just as Cordelia and Oz find them courtesy of Oz's wolfy sense of smell. The secret's out, and Cordelia flees in tears, only to fall through the decaying factory floor and be impaled on a length of metal pole. She ends up in the hospital and everyone's love lives are left in shambles as Spike breezes happily out of town again.
And the moral is: If you're gonna be love's bitch, at least be man enough to admit it.

Willow and Xander's evil alter egos in "The Wish".

"The Wish"
Summary: Cordelia's crushed by Xander's betrayal, and when she returns to school after her stay in the hospital, her former friends are ruthless in their mocking of her pain. She traces all of her problems back to one source, Buffy Summers, and decides that if Buffy had never arrived in town, she would've been spared all the heartache and never have dated Xander in the first place. Cordelia wishes out loud that Buffy Summers had never come to Sunnydale, but unfortunately she says this to the school's new student: who just happens to be Anyanka, an ancient demon and patron of women scorned. Anyanka grants her wish, and Cordelia's thrown into an alternate Sunnydale where Buffy never arrived in town. In a Sunnydale without Buffy, the Master rules in the Bronze, with Willow and Xander -- now vampires -- as his minions. The local human population lives in terror, though Giles, Oz, and a few other Sunnydale students have formed a small resistance group, and Angel's been locked up to be used as a plaything by the unsouled vampires around him. Cordelia is killed by Willow and Xander, and Giles convinces the Council to send Buffy Summers from her present post in Ohio to help in Sunnydale. By the time she arrives, the Master is already opening his factory which automates the blood-letting process and will give him true dominion over town; a battle-hardened Buffy fights the Master as the human resistance fighters battle the vampires, but Willow, Xander and Angel are all dusted, and the Master kills Buffy. Meanwhile, Giles is calling up Anyanka and demanding that she reverse her spell, but she refuses; he smashes her power center, and the world is returned to normal. None of the gang remember the alternate world, but Anyanka is trapped without her power center, forced to live as a human teenager.
And the moral is: Be careful what you wish for. I mean, if you've got a demon who's going to grant you a wish, you should ask for something good, like... a naked Spike lounging on your bed.

Angel: King of pain and master of billow-y coats.

"Amends"
Summary: Everybody's making plans for their Christmas vacation time, and Willow is trying to patch up her relationship with Oz. But everything's not peachy in Sunnydale: Angel's having vivid dreams about his bloody past, and he's plagued by visions of his victims, Jenny Calendar foremost among them. He goes to Giles for help, but the vision of Jenny that stands behind the Watcher causes Angel's guilt to overwhelm him, and he runs off. When Buffy shares one of Angel's dreams of the past, she goes to Giles and tells him that something must be done; together, they deduce that the force that's driving Angel crazy is the First Evil... something that Buffy can't fight, and quite possibly the force that brought Angel back from Hell. Meanwhile, Willow is trying to prove her devotion to Oz and put things right between them again by offering sex in the spirit of the season, but he turns her down, saying that he wants them to be together because they love each other, and not because she wants to prove something to him. Buffy goes after the First Evil's mortal henchmen, the Harbingers, but Angel's being driven over the brink. The First Evil coaxes him to bite Buffy, but he refuses, prefering to die instead. He goes outside to wait for the sun to rise, and Buffy confronts the First Evil, who tells her that Angel will be dead at sunrise. She runs out and finds him, trying to convince him to come inside before he's killed by the sun. He refuses, and after their emotional scene, he's saved by the weather: clouds roll in and cover the sun, and it begins to snow for the first time in Sunnydale.
And the moral is: Uh... don't kill people.

"Gingerbread"
Summary: In an attempt to get to know her daughter's hobbies -- namely slaying -- Joyce shows up on Buffy's nightly patrol, hoping to get to know Buffy better. But Joyce makes a grisly discovery while Buffy fights a vampire: two children lying dead in the playground, apparently the victims of some sort of cult ritual. Deciding that enough is enough and her daughter isn't doing enough to fight evil alone, Joyce forms an anti-occult group in Sunnydale to combat the forces of darkness. Things quickly get out of hand as Joyce is bespelled by the two dead children, who appear to her and egg her on. Buffy, Willow, and their witchy friend Amy are set up to be burned at the stake, with a stack of books as kindling. Amy turns herself into a rat and escapes the fire, and Cordelia and Giles save the other two girls by revealing the "dead children" as a large demon who feeds on the fear and fervor whipped up by Joyce's campaign. Unfortunately, Willow and Giles aren't powerful enough to turn Amy back into a girl, and she's stuck as a rat residing in Willow's room.
And the moral is: Don't condemn what you don't understand. And don't burn books either, dammit.

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