"Millennium "
Airdate: November 28, 1999

It was the moment every X-Phile had been waiting for. Years of anticipation, of unanswered questions and unheard longings, had at least reached their culmination. We counted the hours down, wondering -- what dark secrets would finally be exposed? How would Mulder react when this moment, so long in the waiting, finally came to be? And what, in turn, would Scully do? The wait had ended. The time was now. Frank Black, the protagonist of 1013's canceled series Millennium, was finally going to cross over onto The X-Files!

What? Did you think I was referring to something else?

It speaks volumes of the state of both seventh-season X-Files and the now-terminated Millennium that this episode -- intended to tie up the sketchy Millennium series finale -- will forever be known not as "Millennium", but as "The Kiss Episode." For the Kiss Army -- otherwise known as shippers -- this was the Holy Grail, the ultimate culmination of XF's UST into MSR. (What's a handy abbreviation for "sweeps desperation"? S-E-X.) For the record, the famed Mulder-Scully Kiss -- which the series' producer vehemently denied would ever occur -- lasted all of 30 seconds, was close-mouthed, and, after being so widely awaited (and advertised), came as a dramatic let-down, whether you're a shipper or not. There was more passion in the fourth-season Krycek-Mulder kiss-of-death. Now there's a relationship that could have gotten interesting...

Possibly the only viewers out there more disappointed than lusty shippers (or, for that matter, miffed noromos) were Millennium fans, but, then again, we've had a long legacy of disappointment. Millennium -- a series detailing the struggle of criminal profiler Frank Black (Lance Henriksen) to balance his often gruesome, conspiratorial work with his desire to protect his family -- was one of the most uneven series in television history. Relentlessly depressing but often riveting and oddly moving in its first season, the series truly took off its second year, concentrating more on the fascinating mythology built around the cult-like Millennium Group. By the third season, however, Millennium had lost some of its most essential characters (most notably Frank's wife, Catherine, and partner, Lara Means) and talented writers (Glen and Darin Morgan, James Wong.) It had also abandoned the entire story arc that it had taken an entire season to establish. "Millennium", which involved Mulder, Scully and Frank Black investigating crimes related to the Millennium Group, seemed to be 1013's attempt to finally tie up the series' multiple loose ends.

With a plot straight out of Weekend at Bernie's 2.

I'm not sure whose brilliant idea it was to transform the Millennium Group from a factioned cult obsessed with endtimes prophecy into arbiters of a hokey voodoo necromancy, but the end result is enough to send the greatest Romero zombie scurrying back into the earth. Mulder and Scully become part of an FBI investigation into a mysterious grave robbery, only to find a marking of an ouroboros (the snaky thingie) left at the scene. This is the Millennium Group's symbol (well, until season three) and the pair seek out Frank Black, who has checked himself into a psychiatric ward and retired from his practice. Reluctant to participate, Frank ultimately agrees, only to wind up fighting an army of zombies awoken by the Millennium Group, who rap their goofy incantations like Vanilla Ice gone occult.

Needless to say, "Millennium" did not tie up Millennium's loose ends. There was a nice segue in which Skinner neatly described the history of the Millennium Group, and Lance Henriksen, as always, was excellent. An added bonus for Millennium fans was the all-too-brief appearance of Brittany Tiplady, who was so wonderful as Jordan Black on the original series. Aside from this, however, "Millennium" was a bad X-Files episode and a worse Millennium one. The zombie plot wasn't a bad idea for a stand-alone (my guess is Gilligan could've penned another "Bad Blood" out of this subject matter), but combined with the crossover and the kiss it seemed the series was stretching itself for sweeps, and finding little of substance whichever way it moved.

-- Sarah Kendzior

The X-Files airs at 9pm EST/8pm MNT, Sundays on Fox.

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